Saturday, October 23, 2010

Seven in the morning...

Jim and Bernice 2010
It is seven in the morning. Everyone in my household is sleeping peacefully except me. My heart is troubled over little Samson and his older brother Ronen. How will Ronen understand the depth of the events happening? Today is suppose to be a day full of joy. My brother-in-law, Jim (Andy's brother), is getting married today. All I can think about is a bed far away holding a dying baby and his mama. I've tried to sleep tonight knowing my face will be in pictures today. I just can't hide it. I can't pretend anymore that nothing is happening. My dreams are filled with restless prayers for one so small and so far away. It's like a little piece of me is dying with that little man. If you want to know more about Samson, click here. I dread every phone call, text message, or change of email message. Hoping it won't be THE message to change the status quo. I've resolved to not make this day about Samson, even though my thoughts are consumed with his condition. Today I won't act like I am okay with any of this. I have this feeling I will be getting that phone call during the wedding ceremony. Life continues as one life is ending. Gotta go feed Dylan...

1 comment:

  1. The Lord is in control my sister. We can find comfort in knowing that He will never give us more than we can bare and that no matter the circumstance little Samson is and always has been in Gods hands. Take care of yourself today and give that baby boy of yours the love that you cannot give Samson who is so far from you.