The Beginning Saturday my Brother-in-law got married. It was a beautiful small wedding ceremony. The reception was in a hall was on a beautiful golf course. The fall leaves were brilliant. They made the trees look they were on fire. The catered dinner was delicious! Welcome to the family Bernice, Danny, Ryan,and Bret!
On Saturday evening at 5:21pm little Samson was taken to be with Jesus. We were at the wedding reception. He was being held by his natural daddy. My Auntie Kendra said it best:
"...I was wakeful Friday night, lying next to Samson. I didn't know he'd die within hours of that peaceful time I spent with him, holding his hand, and sometimes whispering in his ear.
- Eric asked God on Saturday afternoon to hold Samson in His arms. Eric felt God say, "I want to, but this respirator is in my way." And sure enough, once Samson was freed of the tether of the breathing tube he took four or five breaths, then silently and peacefully went out into eternity. We chose to set him free from a body that had become a prison instead of artificially prolonging the life he'd showed us was over.
- We agreed to an autopsy, not only to obtain the most accurate cause of death, but also to potentially help another baby in the future. They told us it will be weeks or months until the results are finalized.
- As part of Samson's Memory Box we wanted to have a lock of his beautiful hair. But, with a name like Samson, we thought it prudent to wait until he'd left his "jar of clay" before letting scissors touch his hair. The nurses (neither named Delilah) removed a wee lock from his mullet and tied a blue ribbon around it.
- After we picked up Ronen last night, he said, "go to the hospital, see baby brudder?" Trying to keep the sob out of my voice, I told him Samson was with Jesus. After a few seconds he said, "our house?" And that's where the three of us went, the smallest of us bringing so much comfort to the taller of us. Thank God for Ronen - always, but especially now.
- It occurred to me that life, while more painful and vacuous, just got a lot simpler. As parents Eric and I are responsible to think about when Ronen will move from his crib to a bed, and help him cement this going-to-the-potty-on-the-potty thing. We are no longer responsible to wonder if Samson will make it through the night, or what his future might look like, especially if he remained so sick.
- Each day Samson was in the hospital I wrote down, in my little pink spiral, who his nurse was for the morning and night shifts. Here's how yesterday's entry read:
AM - Jacob
PM - Jesus
Safe in His arms,
Eric, Kendra and Ronen"
A new start
My dear niece, Alexis, decided she wanted to pray last night. She was standing there in the alter, the place of change, when she asked Jesus to come into her heart and life. That mighty creator of ours did as she requested. She stood talking in tongues just as so many before her have. I occurred to me while I standing there next to Alexis sign language interpreting while one life has ended many others have begun. We just begun to see the God promises fulfilled because of his little life.