Here is my list of things nobody told me about parenting (or perhaps I've been told only to forget):
|Baby signing time characters|
- My life would revolve around someone else's daily pillow time, bathing, bowels and belly.
- I would become a preschool teacher. (...and love it!)
- The flushing of the toilet could provide hours of entertainment if allowed.
- I could be nice at 2am, oh... 3am, oh my... 4am, oh-you-take-him-am.
- By encouraging bilinguality, dancing and music, I'd be listening to countless hours of Yo Gabba Gabba, Baby Signing time and other assortments of kids shows/music.
- I'd wake up in the middle of the night with the music from the above shows playing on repeat in my head.
|Yo Gabba Gabba Characters|
- I'd come to love half-words/sentences like og (dog), ca (car), ish-is (fishes), ake-up (wake-up), dat ca top (that car stopped), I do ood (I do good) and cho-cho.
- Brushing teeth is a fun activity.
- I would watch things on TV and relate it all to my child's future or present. I have a hard time watching the news, movies about soldiers/criminals, etc.
- Holidays are more fun with a child/ern.
- Every scribble with a crayon is a brilliant work of art.
- Sidewalk chalk is easier to get off walls than acrylic paint.
- Hair brushes make great spoons for stirring toilet water.
- Toilet paper floats in the sink.
- My son would be better with technology (phones, tablets, Iphones, cameras, dishwashers, etc.) than me who grew up with computers.
- I would become a Jungle gym to climb up, on, or over whenever I moved.
- Hearing music with babbled words would be just as sweet of the sound of laughter and restful breathing.
- I would go to the store or gas station or pretty much anywhere without my sweet kiddo and feel like I was on vacation.
|Some cute kid with a dog.|
- Everything from eating, cooking, cleaning, getting coats on, to putting my own socks on would take about 15-30 minutes longer.
- Dogs would be cause for giggles and be one of the most interesting topics ever.
- I would argue with my son over who gets to vacuum, sweep, and use the steam mop.
- I would feel truly helpless when my son is sick and even more so when I am sick.
- I would have a kid who loves tomatoes and onions, but wouldn't like most red meat, eggs or cheese.
- Apparently texture in food is everything!
- I'm an engineer-rocket-scientist-president-astrologist-billionaire-driver-maid to my kid. Who knew?