Bryce Wilkins

Here's looking at you kid...

Half the congregation at his funeral...

As I sit here in front of my computer, some 1,100 miles away a funeral is happening. I don't understand why this had to happen. It seems so senseless. I've got questions and very few answers.  You see early last Saturday morning my cousin couldn't take the pressures of this life anymore. He decided it was time to breathe his last breath. I'm angry at myself for not knowing him better and for not reaching out to him. I'm angry at him for not calling (to my knowledge) anyone in the family. I may not have been as much apart of his life as I should have, but if had just called I would've opened my home to him no questions asked. That what family does. They help out when someone is in need.

Now I'm supposed to go put a date in our family ancestry records. I don't want to. Here is what I have to post in ancestry.com.

I never understood

I've heard the phrase, works based faith, for years. I have no idea what that phrase means. People claim you can't be saved by your works. I think that is hooey. The bible has countless examples of act done by individuals who went above and beyond, which made them whole. Ninety percent of the major or minor characters, I can think of who's story is told in the Good Book, did something to save someone or save themselves through faith.

• Moses plead with God for his chosen people. It changed God's mind and SAVED the children of Israel from destruction.
• Noah built an ark.
• Easter left her family to go be pampered and save her people.
• David killed Goliath, married the king's daughter, became bros with the Prince, ran for his life, worshipped a lot, etc.
• Abraham got down and dirty with his his good ol' girl.
• Samuel answered the call of God.
• Hannah dedicated her son to the Lord and gave him back for service to him.
• Prophets prophesied.
• Mary and Joseph obeyed.
• John ate bugs and honey. He preached.
• The fisherman left their nets.
• Good ol' Zach, the wee lil' man, climbed a tree, ate with a rabbi, and paid people back.
• That woman touched Jesus' hemmed robe.
• The sad daddy found Jesus for his daughter.
• The nice guy on the other side of Jesus being crucified opened his mouth.
• Jesus' friends wrote some words down, so we could know their friend.

These were all acts based on faith. Faith that salvation would come to those who believed it could happen for themselves and others. We are save through faith AND works. One without the other is like the ocean without salt. If you find it, you aren't at the ocean. Do work.

New Employment

I got a new job! I thrilled about it. I'll be working weekend evenings for a grocery store photo/media department. I've handed in my two weeks notice for my former job. I will be done there on the 21 of October! Can we say WOOT WOOT!?!?

Today I got a sitter for my son and my friend's son to go fill out new hire paperwork and hear about store policies, etc. There comes a time in the new hire paperwork I dread. Every. Single. Time. It's the part where they ask you three different ways what your racial background is. It really isn't any of their business as long as I come to work on time, do my best work, and leave customers as satisfied as possible. It bothers me to think there is someone somewhere could be tallying how many women/men are employed for their company and of what racial origin they descend from. I imagine someone sitting behind a desk in some cubicle saying we have x-number of Hispanic women and y-number of African American men. We have met our quota and shouldn't hire anyone else to throw off the balance.

Why is it that I can't just be American? Why do I have to be Caucasian or of something decent? I was born and raised on American soil. My ancestors have been born and raised here for a couple centuries. That would make me of American descent! I love it if you were born on foreign soil and moved here! Claim your heritage. Celebrate it! I won't discourage you from claiming you are Hispanic American or African American or Russian American, if that is the case. This is such a pet peeve of mine to have to not put on every survey for employment or other things AMERICAN! American is, has been and always will be a melting pot of cultures and beliefs. It has made us who we are. It is why I dig the thought of places like New York and Los Angeles! You have Chinatown sitting a few streets over from Little Italy. What is not to love about that? American has many problems, but it runs in my blood next to the oxygen. I'm not claiming that we are the greatest nation either. I just want my hertiage to be recognized. And dare I say it, celebrated!?!

Nobody told me...

This morning we woke up earlier than usual. I was checking my facebook. I found this blog from a website I discovered before Dylan was born. It was/is a place to talk to other parents about... well everything related to prenatal care, to caring for children, and relationships with your (for some in-)significant other. This morning's blog made me laugh and appreciate parenting. Here it is, if you are interested. These moms were dishing about the things nobody told them about raising a toddler. I think my favorite was about brand new carpet and a toddler getting into some paint...

Here is my list of things nobody told me about parenting (or perhaps I've been told only to forget):

Baby signing time characters

• My life would revolve around someone else's daily pillow time, bathing, bowels and belly.
• I would become a preschool teacher. (...and love it!)
• The flushing of the toilet could provide hours of entertainment if allowed.
• I could be nice at 2am, oh... 3am, oh my... 4am, oh-you-take-him-am.
• By encouraging bilinguality, dancing and music, I'd be listening to countless hours of Yo Gabba Gabba, Baby Signing time and other assortments of kids shows/music.
• I'd wake up in the middle of the night with the music from the above shows playing on repeat in my head.

Yo Gabba Gabba Characters

• I'd come to love half-words/sentences like og (dog), ca (car), ish-is (fishes), ake-up (wake-up), dat ca top (that car stopped), I do ood (I do good) and cho-cho.
• Brushing teeth is a fun activity.
• I would watch things on TV and relate it all to my child's future or present. I have a hard time watching the news, movies about soldiers/criminals, etc.
• Holidays are more fun with a child/ern.
• Every scribble with a crayon is a brilliant work of art.
• Sidewalk chalk is easier to get off walls than acrylic paint.
• Hair brushes make great spoons for stirring toilet water.
• Toilet paper floats in the sink.
• My son would be better with technology (phones, tablets, Iphones, cameras, dishwashers, etc.) than me who grew up with computers.
• I would become a Jungle gym to climb up, on, or over whenever I moved.
• Hearing music with babbled words would be just as sweet of the sound of laughter and restful breathing.
• I would go to the store or gas station or pretty much anywhere without my sweet kiddo and feel like I was on vacation.

Some cute kid with a dog.

• Everything from eating, cooking, cleaning, getting coats on, to putting my own socks on would take about 15-30 minutes longer.
• Dogs would be cause for giggles and be one of the most interesting topics ever.
• I would argue with my son over who gets to vacuum, sweep, and use the steam mop.
• I would feel truly helpless when my son is sick and even more so when I am sick.
• I would have a kid who loves tomatoes and onions, but wouldn't like most red meat, eggs or cheese.
• Apparently texture in food is everything!
• I'm an engineer-rocket-scientist-president-astrologist-billionaire-driver-maid to my kid. Who knew?

This is just a few out of many things, but I'm sure you get the idea. Have a good day!